Posts Tagged "children"
Closer to Nature – my chat with Chris Packham!
As anyone who reads this blog or sees my photographs will know, I’m a bit of a fan of the outside. I sometimes think that my entire natural skill as a parent lies in three areas – I’m pretty hopeless at most else, but when it comes to getting creative and making a mess, reading stories, and, most importantly, poking leafy, muddy things with sticks and jumping in puddles, I really start to shine as a mum.
A couple of weeks ago, the people at Arla contacted me about their Kids Closer to Nature Campaign, to see if I’d like to get involved, The campaign aims to encourage children to reconnect with the nature in their local areas by facilitating Closer to Nature Grants, allowing individuals, communities and families to work together to get our children out of the house and excited about nature.
As part of their work, Arla recently commissioned a report looking at “the population’s changing relationship with nature and the outdoors to show how factors of modern society have led people, specifically children, to be less connected to the natural world around them.” The results are staggering, revealing that almost a quarter of children rarely or never play outside, with the vast majority of children spending DOUBLE the time watching television than they do playing outside.
Parents’ reasons for this, including the social pressures of busy lives and concerns about safety, are valid but still fall short somehow. I myself know the pressure of trying to fit everything in into a day, and especially how lack of energy and a dozen things to get done can often make staying inside, TV on, the easier and seemingly less stressful option when you have a toddler. But do I really want Kai to grow up not knowing what it’s like to find conkers, or pick blackberries, or find a bird’s nest? No, I really, really don’t. Even as a parent usually keen to get outside and have Kai learn about nature not from a book or a TV show, but by getting his hands dirty, I’ve been challenged by the report’s results and started to rethink the balance of our inside-outside living. And I know I’m not alone – over 95% of parents when questioned agree that they think more time outside would make their children healthier and happier.
Last Friday I was delighted to have the chance to have a chat with none other than Chris Packham, TV naturalist, photographer and wildlife expert, who is backing Arla’s campaign, to talk about his frustration at the way in which our children seem to be losing their relationship with the natural world, and how we can overcome the apparent obstacles of modern society and our tendency for us to keep our children inside. Chris was lovely: full of passion and a practical, common-sense attitude about the whole thing which I really warmed to. I came off the phone inspired, with feet itching to don wellies and go get muddy with Kai.
As well as chatting about Chris’ childhood, growing up firmly rooted in the natural world around him, and how that has led to a lifelong passion for wildlife, Chris and I talked about his own top tips for parents to help get their own children enthused about nature.
1. Don’t let your appreciation of nature be “weather dependent”
It is all too easy to glance out of the window in the morning, see that it is cold and wet, and opt out of ‘outside’ for the day, moving our kids from inside space to inside space by way of the car. But as Chris rightly pointed out, we live in a country where it generally rains A LOT! This is our climate! We need to be teaching our children to enjoy nature in the country they live in – and that means getting wet! Children, generally, are far hardier than they we assume, and warm outdoor and wet-weather gear is usually affordable and easily available. One of Kai’s favourite activities is walking in the rain with his little umbrella, it’s ME that doesn’t enjoy it very much! This is a case of us as parents being hardier, and bringing up our children to be the same. If we forever wait for a dry day, chances are, for most of the year, our opportunities will be far and few between!
2. Have a healthy and common-sense attitude toward cleanliness – “cotton wool-ing” is not an answer.
Insisting that our children always have clean hands and a “don’t touch” mentality is only going to be barrier to our children properly enjoying nature – a look but don’t touch environment is no fun at all!. As Dr William Bird, the campaign’s independent adviser on the health benefits of nature points out, the development of a healthy immune system depends on exposure to natural bacteria. So let your children learn through touch, let them prod, poke, pick up and get mucky while they’re outside. It is the tactile, sensory experiences that children will remember and love the most.
3. Remember that nature isn’t dependent on where you live
Even in the heart of cities and busy towns there are ample opportunities for children to experience the natural world. Green spaces, footpaths and parks all provide environments that give children the chance to get close to nature and learn about wildlife where they live. Nature doesn’t always have to be exotic and wild, you don’t need to live in the middle of rolling countryside or right next to a nature reserve – encourage children to look for, and notice wildlife where they are because it IS there.
4. If you’re worried about your child’s saftey, make use of the many safe, supervised opportunities for them to be outside.
Youth and community groups and schools are a fantastic way for children to get outside within a secure, trusted environment, especially when our own time is often short. We should be working with our schools and communities to take a leading role in children’s nature education, getting children out of the classroom and outside as part of their day-to-day educational experience. Encouraging school involvement means that all sections of our society are covered – all children go to school meaning wherever you live, your child will get a chance to experience nature. Arla’s Back to Nature Grants, which anyone can apply for, are a fantastic way for us to help enhance our schools’ and communities’ nature resources, providing small-scale grants as well as larger grants up to £1500. Chris encouraged parents to talk their children and work with their teachers and community workers to help children come up with their own ideas about how to encourage nature in their area. Whether it’s just putting up some bird boxes, buying some allotment space for a school, or making a nature trail through local woodland, Back to Nature Grants provide everyone with the opportunity to do something.
To find our more about Arla’s Back to Nature Campaign and how to apply for a grant for a local nature project, have a look at their website for lots of encouragement and ideas.
Many thanks to Chris for his time. I narrowly missed out on a chance to meet him in person this time, but really hope to have another opportunity soon, so watch this space!
I’d love if you could help add to Chris’ top tips. What are your best ideas to encourage parents to get their children out of the house and discovering wildlife?
Read MoreBah Humbug – A Christmas Rant
Gah what is it with all you people and your determination to make Christmas last as long as possible?!
Not only have I had to suffer Christmas hitting our high street before Halloween this year, now December 1st has rolled round I’m suddenly met with endless accounts of people with their tree up, presents bought and wrapped, and Christmas cards written.
Now don’t get me wrong, I love Christmas. But I just start to think about it on the 1st, using the whole advent period to gently warm up to the idea. I put up Kai’s advent calendar last night and got my first little Christmas tingle filling it with various disproportionately sized plastic animals for him to find each day. By the weekend I might just start thinking about doing some Christmas shopping. In another couple of week’s we’ll put the tree up and try a think of a way that we can ensure it survives three weeks of toddler attention. I probably won’t even eat a mince pie for at least another fortnight. This way my excitement builds slowly up to an uncontrollable hysteria on Christmas Eve (where my brother will come and we will play board games and eat our body weight in buffet food), a night lying awake wondering if that sound I just heard really was Santa, not daring to move and thinking that all those unbelievers are going to feel such eejits when they don’t get a Canon SLR under their tree, and then be up at the crack of dawn for a few days of festivities and more food and mulled wine than should probably be legal.
If I started with it all too soon, my excitement would have peaked and waned by the time we gotten half way through advent and I’d be bored and disinterested with the whole thing by the time the big day rolled round. Now fair enough if you personally have the energy to maintain your Christmas Spirit for endless weeks at a time, I just don’t have it in me.
And, for me, having Christmas last a whole month, or even longer, kind of throws out my whole rhythm for the year. Christmas is a specific day, or a few days at most, which is proceeded by ADVENT. Which, if you’re of the non-religious persuasion as I am, means a time of getting ready. If you’ve already got ready then what the frick is the point? You’ve lost all the build-up, all the magic – all you’ve got to look forward to is three weeks of novelty chocolates which I swear are made up of the ground up cardboard of last year’s advent calendars.
*sigh*
I’ll stop ranting now. I don’t mean to wee on your Yule log or anything like that.
I’m just saying, let’s all calm down a bit shall we. We’ve got 24 days people, let’s enjoy them.
Read MoreJust when I thought I was going to lose my mind…
Ten ways in which the Universe was kind to me today:
1. Not only did Kai only wake up ONCE last night, he slept in until, wait for it, 8am!!!!! I got up before him, got dressed, made a cuppa. It was quite possibly the best morning of my life.
2. All that sleep meant Kai was in a KILLER mood. We laughed, we nearly wee’d ourselves with excitement riding the bus, we only had a handful of minor meltdowns at Playgroup and Kai made friends with a small girl with pretty hair. Toast was eaten, toys were shared. It was legendary.
3. When we got home Kai sat happily and drunk half a cup of moo moo milk (as opposed to mama milk). This is only the second time I’ve got him to drink any with out screaming and throwing it at me. If you were in the Midlands area and heard a Ahhhh sound that would have been my boobs sighing with relief. We’re down to two feeds in 24 hours people! TWO!
4. In one of those adorable toddler moments, every sip of Kai’s milk was accompanied by a “mmmm!”, a lip smack and a big grin. I’ve been giving him milk everyday and encouraging him to drink it with lots of “yum yum” and “ooh delicious!” – looks like he’s cottoned on the fact that moo moo milk = gooooood.
5. After drinking said milk we read a story (about diggers obviously), we drew the curtains and Kai lay down in his cot and went to sleep. Just like that. That is the first nap time without tears in about a fortnight.
6. While Kai was asleep I made two cups of tea. I’m not sure who the other one was for but I drank them both. With biscuits. I may make two cups more often.
7. The powers-that-be have decided to dig up a car park in the town centre. That means DIGGERS people. Diggers for probably all this week. This afternoon Kai spent 20 ecstatic minutes watching those diggers, who happened to be driven by friendly digger men who were happy to flash their lights and spin the diggers round and drop things from high up to make a better crash all for my rapt little boy. We will be back.
8. Instead of screaming all the way home, Kai sang. Loudly. It made everyone we walked past smile – not frown and look alarmed at the thrashing hysterical toddler that has been the norm for the last week or two.
9. We got back and Kai SAT. And gave me kisses, and giggled at me talking to him in a funny voice, and played with his cars beautifully till his Dad got home. I remembered how much I love him and decided I might not run way to New Zealand after all.
10. Bed time went without a whimper. Kai chose his fire engine book, we sniggered at the instruction to “feel the Fireman’s hard helmet”, and then we said “Night Night” and he lay down and went to sleep. Again.
Thank you Universe. Now why can’t everyday be like this??!
Read MoreSo…emm… what am I supposed to be doing again?
It’s confession time here at SIFTW. Because I have a guilty secret to share…
I am a rubbish stay-at-home-mum.
This is not me saying that I’m a dreadful mother or anything (well, not VERY dreadful), it’s just that I don’t think this whole SAHM thing particularly suits me. Turns out I’m really not very good at it.
I was ok when Kai was tiny – being a mum then was mostly about keeping him alive and preventing him from drowning in the accumulated pile of his own vomit and poo. Simples. You put milk and food in one end, you clean up the other end, you sing lots of silly songs and pull funny faces and spend long hours just cuddling and cooing gobbledegook at each other. It was exhausting, but there was only a limited amount of potential for screwing up. It was kinda dull but it was a simpler, less complicated time.
These days? Man alive, I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.
Because these days I have a little person to look after. Who toddles and climbs and chatters earnestly and nonsensically during every waking moment. Who loves Matchbox cars and Thomas the Tank Engine (possibly more than he loves me), and does NOT like broccoli or soup or being asked to do something he doesn’t want to do.
This is a little person that copies, that is learning and changing at a rate of knots, and that has potential bursting out of orifice.
It is exciting and interesting and Kai seems to get more and more fricking adorable by the hour. But it scares the crap out of me.
Suddenly the potential for screwing up now seems lots, lots bigger. I’m not entirely sure what I’m supposed to DO with this little fierce ball of independent motion.
Am I supposed to be teaching him stuff??
Because here’s the other half of the confession and reason I’m a rubbish SAHM…
I’m not very good at playing.
I’m VERY good a cuddling, and tipping upside down, and playing hide-and-seek, and making Kai laugh until he cries and doing stories with silly voices, and helping him to get covered in food, and romping about in the sunshine, and eating cake together.
I am RUBBISH at structured play.
And the worst thing?
It bores me. Dreadfully.
I thought I would be great at playing. That I would have infinite energy AND WILLINGNESS to invest in making up exciting and educational games for Kai to partake in. But after 10 minutes of block building and car racing and colouring in I’m getting antsy. My lack of enthusiasm after a while must show as Kai usually quickly shuns me and my attention in favour of independent play, embarking on his complicated games of hiding cars under the sofa or trying to post things through the letter box. And I, relived, skulk off back to whatever project I have waiting for me and that I am currently obsessing over.
I do DO stuff with him. We go to at least one playgroup a week, meet up with friends, take lots of walks and trips to the park. We go to the Library (toy and regular) and the sensory room, and sometimes swimming if I can summon up the energy.
But at home? At home I suck.
And it worries me. Should I be doing more? Kai doesn’t know his colours and seems to think all animals go “mooo” or “woof” regardless of what they are. He gets confused between his knees and ears (although gets ‘willy’ right every time – go figure). He barely says any proper words at all.
I worry that that his education now in this kind of thing is down to me and that I am failing him. I feel like I should be taking more responsibility for his learning. I wonder whether he’d be better off at nursery but then hate the thought of it as I would miss him dreadfully.
Mostly I worry that I should WANT to do more ‘stuff’ with him, that I should be motivated and inspired to fill his days with learning and creativity and variation. That I should go to bed full of plans for what ‘enrichment activities’ I might do with Kai tomorrow and NOT my next writing project. That this SHOULD be enough for me.
The fact that it isn’t worries me most of all.
It is official. I am a SHIT stay-at-home-mum.
—————————————————————————
Amendment:
I have loved the comments on this post. Especially as they come from some of the mum’s I have THE most respect for. You tell me that I’m doing fine and I believe you. Thank you.
So I take it back. I am not shit. Because turns out I am just like you and I think you are AWESOME. So I guess that makes me? Well, not shit anyway.
Thanks. Thanks again. And thanks some more.
Is it stupid that I genuinely feel a huge deal better? Cause I really, really do.
x
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