Day Off « Sleep is for the Weak

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Day Off

Can I not be a mum today?
I fear it’s not my calling.
The hours are crap for starters
And the job description’s boring.

I’d rather be an astronaut.
At least it’s quiet up there.
My wobbly bits would suit no-grav,
Suspended in the air.

Or I could try out espionage.
I’d be great at fearless guile:
“Yes sweetheart this is REALLY fun!”
I’d lie through sugared smile.

I could train wild animals,
Poo wouldn’t make me queasy.
I’ve braved a toddler cutting canines
So a lion would be easy.

I hear Human Research pays well,
Volunteering’s all the rage.
And you get to lie down everyday
In an aesthetic haze.

Even prison inmate
Seems more attractive by the hour.
At least I’d get my meals served
And time to take a shower.

Can I not be a mum today?
One day, that’s all I ask!
I promise then I won’t resent
My normal humdrum tasks.

One day of something different
To be adventurous, inspiring.
After all, I’m over qualified:
Is anybody hiring?!

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Jo

Hi Josie, love this post, please can I include it in this year's edition of 'mummomag', an online magazine entirely by mums for mums? You can see last year's edition at www.mummomag.co.uk. It'd be great if I could use this, it's just so funny and pertinent ... especially on Mothers' Day, which is the day that the magazine will be released. Hope you say 'yes'! Thanks - Jo

1 Husband, 2 Kids

Brilliant, love the poem - very clever. As for the day off, I wish.. the odd, very rare, day off from work when I was too ill to work, yet well enough to read is one of the things I miss most about being a working mum

Heather

Fabulous! Utterly brilliant. You, my dear, are one witty and entertaining writer. Stop all this 'I'm no good, me' stuff right now. That's an order ;)

Muddling Along Mummy

I am really enjoying your burgeoning addiction to poetry !
.-= Muddling Along Mummy´s last blog ..Bloggers for Haiti =-.

Aly

You is a dab hand at there poetry too m'lady.Most excellent! Oh, could you be a dear and change the the title of my blog on your 'friends' list to Life's Laundry please, thank you very muchly.
.-= Aly´s last blog ..Bloggers for Haiti =-.

Tim

Day off? No chance... you're serving the whole-term life tariff with the rest of us! And don't even think of good behaviour... although you might get some remission for literary merit. Great poem!
.-= Tim´s last blog ..Objective meaning =-.

turtleturtleturtle

How talented you are.
Love it!
.-= turtleturtleturtle´s last blog ..Craft Hope for Haiti =-.

Marta

Ha, ha! You've read my mind!
.-= Marta´s last blog ..Interview 6: Jeremy Holland =-.

becky

brilliant sums it up nicely!
.-= becky´s last blog ..100 Books Challenge =-.

Foodie mummy

Hilarious! Where do you get all that inspiration from! I really admire you! X
.-= Foodie mummy´s last blog ..Thank you... =-.

Victoria

Love it! Glad to see that the pile of library books are being put to good use ;)

Vegemitevix

Fantastic! I may adapt it as my motto. Doesn't seem to get better as they get older. My latest blog post http://usebefore.blogspot.com/2010/01/piggy-in-...

Kelly

Hahahaha hilarious!
.-= Kelly´s last blog ..The Real Life Mrs Weasley =-.

Erin

Thanks for the laugh. . . I'm totally having one of those days here also. . .

Theresa

Brilliant. So many funny lines!
.-= Theresa´s last blog ..Chicken Scraps, Anyone? =-.

Nickie

Great little poem :) and it rings sooooooo true!
.-= Nickie´s last blog ..The Cough =-.

The Moiderer

**applauds** I enjoyed that
.-= The Moiderer´s last blog ..Potty training =-.

Linda

Love it! I tried to "adapt" the Persil 'What is a mum?" poem last year:
http://www.gotyourhandsfull.com/2009/08/what-is...
I definitely prefer your take over the advertising team's! x